Hookay, so here’s what happened this time… I started writing this kind of cool story with aliens in it and it turned out that, despite what it had claimed when it was inside my head, it wasn’t actually a flash fiction idea, but a story that could only possibly be told as a proper short story. So I didn’t have anything for last Friday. But I’m not giving up. So here’s another “not quite” entry and I will get back on schedule this Friday. BY CROM I SWEAR IT! Another idea inspired by the fff’s hyperspace suggestion.

ANOTHER FUNNY THING HAPPENED IN HYPERSPACE

“Captain, there are two Cholian battlecruiser decloaking aft,” Lieutenant Ch’aaan’s leftmost speaking tube announced in its thin, warbling voice. The lieutenant paused, rechecking their instruments. Then its central speaking tube boomed. “They’re powering up weapons systems.”

“Damn!” Captain Sparrow jabbed at the buttons on his control panel, bringing up a tactical display. “How long until we’re in range?”

“About fifty-five seconds,” sang Ch’aaan’s fourth, fifth and sixth rearmost tubes in perfect harmony.”

“Engineering?”

“I… I…” Ensign Lahksmann stumbled over her words, flicking at switches.

“Dammit Engineering, give me a report.”

“Sorry sir. Chief Engineer Ashalook reports the drive is back online, but he needs twenty minutes to properly align the neutrino injectors and get them within necessary operating tolerances.”

“Ch’aaan, what’s the situation with those Cholians?”

“Zey are refuthing to anthwer our hailth,” lisped Ch’aaans’ third from the right speaking tube. “Zey moveth to a attack vector.”

“Engineering, get the drive online and get us out of here or we’re going to be smeared across this corner of the universe.”

“Zee Choliaaans haaave aaa lock, Caaaptaaannn!” Ch’aan’s dorsal tubes drawled.

Sparrow stabbed at the buttons on his console.

“Ashalook?”

“I’m doing awl ah can, Capt’an!” The engineer’s disembodied voice announced.

“That may not be enough, Ash.”

“Mittiles launched! Mittiles launched!”

“Ash, I need that hyperdrive.”

“Spinning her now, Capt’an,” Ashalook said. “But may god preserve us all!”

“Achilles prepare for hyperspace jump,” Captain Sparrow announced to the whole crew. “Godspeed!”

- “And cut! Everyone hold positions, we’re just going to run back the VT.”
- “Can some one get me a drink of water,” the voice that emerged from under Ch’aaan was plaintive. “And please don’t forget the straw this time.”
- Russ Beam relaxed back in to Captain Sparrow’s chair, fiddling with the plastic buttons and switches on the console while staring at the ceiling.
- Kaylie Ashboom fiddled casually with her hair while a continuity girl rearranged her costume Ensign’s to make it more revealing. When the continuity girl turned away to check on Ch’aaan’s tubes, Kaylie covered herself up a little.
- “Okay, we’re going to go from the top again. And Kaylie? Kaylie! Let’s give it a bit more oomph this time, okay?”

“Captain, there are two Cholian battlecruiser decloaking aft,” Lieutenant Ch’aaan’s leftmost speaking tube announced…